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I feel old.  I am old.  I’ve mentioned this.  When I say I’m old to my mother, she reminds me that she had my sister when she was my age.

I remind her that my sister is 31 and then we both need a drink.

I may not be old enough to have been able to buy a teenie boppers magazine with The Beatles on the cover (though John Lennon was my first love, RIP.)  But I am old enough to have plastered my bedroom with all things New Kids On The Block, or NKOTB if you’re too tired to say their entire band name.

I mean it’s a lot of words.

Every young girl (and gay guy) had their favorite New Kid, am I right?  Don’t even dare lie about it.  The New Kids were so popular; they were even summoned to help find a missing girl way back when.

I’m not kidding.  The New Kids On The Block were on an episode of Unsolved Mysteries.

Sexy, eh?  So, like it or not, those of us who were so inclined had a romantic obsession with at least one (or if you were a little frisky for your age two) of the members.

The other day, my husband and I were talking about the New Kids (I have zero ideas how the hell we arrived at this topic) and started slipping down memory lane about how I was in love with Donnie Wahlberg.  I loved Donnie because he was the bad boy.  Sure he had a rat tail haircut and a bad attitude, but he was my favorite New Kid and let no bitch try and say, Joey, Jordan, Johnny, or Danny were better than Donnie.

I loved Donnie, and because of this, I feel this choice influenced me to date many dipshits for the majority of my dating life.

Seriously, I dated some losers.  There were a couple of nice guys mixed in, but ultimately, I left them for guys who were more adventurous, aka hot messes.

favorite-new-kids-block-member-infuenced-love-life

Photo: Pinterest

I mean, how could you not want to drink beers and drive away into the sunset in a stolen Chevy with this guy?

Or drown in Joey’s eyes?

Or ice Jordan’s nuts on the high notes?

It’s like this, depending on the NKOTB member you were obsessed with, probably had a lot to do with your love life wins and losses.

Jordan:  The falsetto frontman with dashing good looks and a blowout only Pauly D could rival.  He could reach notes like Mariah Carey and probably charm your mom.  If you were into Jordan, you probably dated guys who had a little mystery to them, but were a pretty face and looked good in pictures.  You didn’t marry this guy, but probably know someone who did.

Photo: Pinterest

 

Joey:  The young one with the big blue eyes which set the stage for the likes of Justin Beiber’s rise to fame.  Before the balls dropped, he was the cute little guy.  After the balls had done dropped, the baby face remained and got smexy.  If you were into Joey, you probably dated a guy slightly younger than you, who also had a baby face, and let’s be honest; you’re still stalking him and his wife on social media on sleepless nights.  I mean, c’mon, look at this guy!

 

favorite-new-kids-block-member-infuenced-love-life

Photo: Pinterest

Jonathan Knight:  He was underrated.  I mean, he was cute and obviously brought something to the group, but weren’t there always at least two members of a boy band who were like pretty basic.  I remember Jonathan dated Tiffany (I am really aging myself here) and people wanted to spike her Tab with Drano.  I mean, he didn’t marry Tiffany, because he’s gay.  Yeah, in case you didn’t know.   If you were into Jonathan, you wanted a high school sweetheart type, but, realistically, likely fell in love with a gay guy, and you’re still really good friends.

Photo: Pinterest

Danny Wood:  He was kinda the last in line when it came to NKOTB crushes.  I knew a girl who liked Danny the most.  He seemed quiet and introspective.  I think he got married and had a shit ton of kids.  He’s also really into fitness and appears to have been the inspiration for the casting goals for the Jersey Shore reality show.  If you were into Danny, you probably like guys who lift, tan and believe in old fashioned relationship goals.  You likely are helping him bench press your youngest child over his head right now.

favorite-new-kids-block-member-infuenced-love-life

Photo: Pinterest

I saved the best for last, Donnie Wahlberg:  Donnie was the “bad boy” of the NKOTB.  He has tattoos, thrust his junk on the edge of the stage, and comes from one of Boston’s most beloved working class families.  I’ve had several government cheese cheeseburgers at the famous Wahlburgers, and I’m not mad about it.  He married Jenny McCarthy a few years ago he currently plays a detective on the tv series Blue Bloods.   If you were into Donnie, you liked guys who had an appetite for trouble and beautiful women.  You didn’t date him for a long while you were both young.  You likely spent years dating guys just like him until you just decided to be happy and now you’re probably settled down with a nice, sensible man.    At least, that’s what finally happened to me. I’m not looking back and neither should you.  Despite what Jenny McCarthy has done, you don’t marry bad boys.  You date them, cry over them, and block them on all social media.

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Photo: Pinterest

 

Who was your favorite guy?  Here’s their pick for favorite girls. (P.S. It’s you!)

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The ‘Waiting’ Game

Well, it came, after nearly eight months of a hiatus, Pretty Little Liars returned with it’s first of the final ten #endgame episodes, “Playtime.

I know that it was a premier event and that there was only so much territory possible covered, but I kinda hated this episode.  Andrea Parker (Mary Drake) said there would be a “mouth-gaped” shock moment in episode 7×11.

… an absolutely, pick-your-teeth-up-off-the-floor, mouth-gaped, didn’t-see-that-coming” scene happens in the first episode of 7B. It’s right up top. It happens pretty fresh in the first episode… and it is an exciting ride.”  (Source)

Um, when?  Did I miss it?

Unless Parker was referring to the most obvious of obviousness?

When it comes to Spencer, Peter Hastings IS the father (and Mary was supposed to be Jessica, but then wasn’t.)

Of course, Mary Drake is Spencer’s mom.  Of course, Peter slept with her ‘thinking she was Jessica DiLaurentis.’  For real, 85% of the PLL fandom already predicted this.

It was an NC-17 switcharoo; Peter needed to get his playtime sorted out.

Mmmmmkay?

playtime-pll-7x11

Photo: Bustle.com

Also, what the hell kind of cruise was Peter and Veronica on that, they took a week to get back to their recently shot daughter?  And Peter had trouble with his passport?  Is that because it’s a fake and he’s wearing a mask?  I won’t go there, but I bet somebody will.

I feel for Spencer, however.  What a mess.  This girl cannot catch a break with that clan of hers.  Mary being her biological mother actually does make a lot of sense.

The ‘ships have sailed

Okay, I know people shit their pants over Haleb, but they bore me.  I don’t care about the ships at all.  Unless it’s the friendSHIPS, I don’t ship it.  I just can’t with these couples.

Regarding the ships, I will say this though, APPLAUSE to Emily Fields for telling Ali to back the fuck up unless she figures her sexuality out, right quick.

I still hate Ezra

Ezra.  He’s AD.  You know what I think.  Is he in New York with Nicole’s family?  No.  He was translating his plans to torment his girlfriend and her friends into braille for Jenna Marshall.

“Keep planning your wedding, Aria, and he’ll show up,”  says Hanna.

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#NeverForget your first reaction, girl. Photo: Pinterest

Um, no.  Take a break from the bullshit, Aria, and try and figure out why somebody wants to ruin your life so badly.  I mean, besides the obvious.

Who the hell is in France?  

Spencer’s gunshot wound was from a .22, not Jenna’s .45.  Marco Polo confirmed the ballistics.  But Archer’s passport was scanned in France.

So some mofo is eating baguettes by The River Seine with a Huw Collins mask?  This stinks of Charlotte, and I don’t know how I feel about that.  I’m still holding out hope for Melissa’s involvement.

Emma Dumont

Katherine Daly is .actually a chick named Katherine Daly.  The fandom had all hoped that the name Katherine Daly was a cover up for a young Mary Drake flashback.  Lame.  Hanna gave her a dress to wear, and Mona took the credit. We don’t have time for this.

Again, we don’t have time for this.

The return of ‘Bitchy Ali’

“Bitchy Ali” is back.  My prediction?  She’ll be gone by minute 4 of the next episode with maybe a few bits of flare here and there (ooh, that rhymes!).  That wasn’t the old Ali that was the hormonal-I’m-knocked-up-with-a-conman’s-baby, Ali.

Playtime?

AD’s board game is ridonkulous.

I do, however, like the idea that the Liars are forced to put together a puzzle.

Time is too limited for the game to be random at this point.

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Photo: Teen Vogue

The bottom line?

This episode didn’t meet my expectations, but I suppose this is because of the super long break we had to endure.

I’m, of course, going to keep playing Marlene King’s game.

Because believe it or not, I have faith that the ending will be worth all of her fuckery.

So, greatest troll of the Internet Marlene, let’s play!

Despite my feelings on this episode, I want more.

Did you watch? What are your predictions for the #endgame?

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are-overpriced-fitness-classes-worth-the-cost

As a fitness professional, I am all about trying to help people achieve fitness. When I say this, I mean it. I charge SUPER reasonable prices for my services and am willing to work with people’s budgets whenever possible.

I do not believe that exercise should be for the elite, Lululemon toting population only and that’s why I don’t support brands that charge the price of a compact car for their classes.

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#TrollCycle

Overpriced Fitness Classes

Overpriced fitness classes are a dick move, okay.  Some of them won’t even participate in ClassPass or Groupon.  In my opinion, these brands are promoting “you can’t sit with us” fitness, and it pisses me off.

overpriced-fitness-classes

Photo Credit: Pinterest

Exercise and movement should be available to everyone. I mean, the first time I read the price of a single boutique cycling class, I was sickened. I know everybody is trying to make a buck in this industry and I’m not that great at it because I believe that everyone should be able to work out (at least once) with a trainer on their fitness journey.

Also, I’ve mentioned this before, but I take issue with the athleisure racket going on these days.  Not only are leggings the cost of week’s worth of groceries for a family of four, but they are only sold in sizes for people who require the least amount of exercise possible.

I’m cool with celebrities having the best of the best and being able to afford $75 indoor fitness classes and $3500/month for a personal trainer, but this ploy to get regular people to participate in this bullshit is beyond me.

As a certified Mad Dogg Athletics instructor, I can also say without any hesitation that some of these high end boutique classes are bad for you.  As in, they will likely injure you due to their heavy focus on exercise contraindications.

Are overpriced fitness classes worth the cost?

Don’t believe me?  Read this,  this, or this.

Not that SoulCycle stands alone in this criticism.  As a former instructor of a popular dance fitness class, I had to stop after the first year because the monthly license fees, insurance, music, and apparel were costing me more than it was worth.  I thought to myself, I love to dance, but there is no reason why people should have to pay me $15/class so that I could afford to dress like MC fucking Hammer and teach classes using corporate choreography.

The bottom line is; I am just sick of the elites in the fitness world.  I know that they have always been there, but right now, in a time when more than 50% of people earn £20k ($30k USD) or less a year, the fact that people have to feel like shit about not being able to take the “hottest fitness classes” is bullshit.

Want my professional advice?  Oh, well, you’re gonna get it anyway: Find something you love to do that isn’t going to cost you 25% of your salary and go for it.  There are plenty of free and/or inexpensive fitness programs out there.

For instance, like my free 7-Day fitness challenge over on my coaching site.  You can download it for free and jump-start your fitness routine.

Getting fit can be effective and affordable.  You don’t have to be part of an elite cult to get in shape.  Believe me.

Have you tried trendy boutique fitness classes?  Do you find them to be worth the money?

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It’s been, like, a decade since the season 7A finale of Pretty Little Liars, right? The wait is nearly over for diehard fans (or those watching because the invested time and energy will not allow them to ‘give up’.)

Even people ‘hate watching’ the show are still curious to see how it all ends.  Either that or they are using it as motivation for hate mailing Marlene King on June 21st.

Whichever it is, we’re all in this together.

Could Sabrina and Ezra be AD on Pretty Little Liars

Photo Credit: PLL Wiki

I’m a PLL Reddit lurker who has never joined in on the community, but I have seen some interesting thoughts and theories posted over the past seven months.

As well my fave PLL podcasters over at CAbernet and A who introduced PLL ‘newbies’ Babe and Leo over the hiatus to give a fresh perspective on the Liars, their lovers, and other Felicia’s of the series.

Leo has it pinned on Ezra Fitz, and I couldn’t agree with him more.

I have been suspicious of Ezra for the majority of PLL. I don’t trust him. He’s shifty, selfish, manipulative, and fucking weird.

Ezra’s role has been questionable at the best of times and downright nefarious at others (season 4).

I am also aware that I am putting a target on myself by saying I think that the EzriA relationship is not impressive.

As a person who provides relationship coaching, I can honestly say that Aria not only needs to stay away from Ezra, she needs to take a break from dudes in general.

Ezra has been playing Aria since the day he preyed on her by pretending he didn’t know she was 16 and the best friend of the ‘dead’ girl he had been dating a year earlier.

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Photo Credit: ToShellWithItBlog

So, yeah. I don’t ship EzriA at all. And I think this is a sentiment that much of the PLL fandom has (even people who ship them admit that at points the relationship is kinda gross.)

My ideal ending would be that Ezra is AD. I don’t know all of the logistics of it or even what his ultimate motive is, but I believe he is behind all of this.

There are theories that he is a distant DiLaurentis or Drake. I think his connection to CeCe runs a lot deeper than what we discovered during season 4B.

There are theories that he is a friend/relative of Wren Kingston.

There are theories that he has been manipulating the girls this whole time (including his recently relocated girlfriend, Nicole) as twisted muses for his book plotlines.

There are theories that Ezra is just a creepy psycho, and there is PLENTY of evidence to support them.

Tumblr user rosewoodrebel hints that perhaps there is a connection between Ezra and Bethany Young.

My opinion is going to be a super unpopular pseudo-theory (and it’s not entirely original either), but I think that Sabrina is Bethany Young and I believe she is managing a hell of a lot more for Ezra than the Brew Cafe.

Could Sabrina and Ezra be AD on Pretty Little Liars

Photo Credit: BuddyTv.com

I know, I know – then, really, WHO THE F**K IS IN THE GRAVE?!

PLL has faked multiple dead bodies.

They faked dead Toby in season 3 (complete with ‘901 Free At Last’ tattoo) and we can’t forget about the “cadaver” from season 5 that Rosewood PD believed was the body of an also not dead Mona Vanderwaal.

So, how do they know that the police records were not botched by A to make it appear that the random female body in the grave is not who they think it is?

More on Sabrina, the edibles baker, who appears from thin air in season 6A.

Sabrina has no last name. Sabrina has no social media presence. Sabrina happens to manage the very place that the Liars go to discuss all things murder and mayhem. We don’t know Sabrina’s age. We don’t know anything about her except for the fact that she had cancer, can bake cupcakes and lemon bars, and makes a decent cup of coffee.

We know that Sabrina smokes ‘medicinal’ marijuana. According to CeCe, Bethany is the one who suffered from IED, not her. So here’s an interesting aside:

Medical Marijuana and Intermittent Explosive Disorder (IED)

The conventional treatment for IED through both cognitive behavioral therapy and psychotropic medication regimes, have shown very limited success given the patients refusal to take any prescribed opiates that alter their mood because this is not deemed as a “natural” process.

IED is linked to conditions such as depression, bipolar disorder, stress and attention hyper activity disorder, for which medical marijuana is a fantastic treatment. Research has found medical marijuana to have active ingredients that are used to treat symptoms and conditions such as stress, severe anxiety, chronic pain and abnormal respiratory functions.

THC an active cannabinoid in medical marijuana tends to serve as a great mood alteration and provides patients with a very calm and serene view of the world around them. Cannabis’ ability to effectively modify the “fight or flight” impulse response makes it a perfect solution for IED. (Medical Marijuana Association).

Interesting, right?

Oh, and Sabrina HATES it when people lie to her.

Hmm. Who else went bonkers apeshit over being lied to?

Could Sabrina and Ezra be AD on Pretty Little Liars

Photo Credit: www.analyzinga.weebly.com

Another thing I got thinking about was something I noticed during the EzrA episodes. In Hot for Teacher, the film playing in the A tag is Dark Passage, which is about a man who is accused of murdering his wife and undergoes “illicit backroom plastic surgery” to stay under the radar. Since 4B is the season we learn that Alison isn’t dead and that somebody else is “in the box,” could it be possible that Bethany underwent plastic surgery to stay under the radar?

We’ve never seen Bethany’s face.

Maybe when Mona or Melissa (or whoever) hit Bethany over the head with the shovel, they did enough damage that it would have required reconstructive surgery.

If Bethany and Ezra are linked somehow, this could be why Sabrina just appears out of nowhere after the girls are free from the Dollhouse and why she would still be around after the five-year time jump.

Also, a possible bonus parallel: Emily is hooking up with Sabrina and let’s not forget, she also hooked up with another one of A’s sidekicks.

Could Sabrina and Ezra be AD on Pretty Little Liars

Emily’s choices

Could Sabrina and Ezra be AD?

How exactly are Ezra and Sabrina (Bethany) connected?

I’m not sure. I do think Cece, Ezra, and Bethany all worked together at some stage.

I had a thought that maybe Ezra found out about Bethany during his book”research” days and paid her for information about the DiLaurentis family, especially Jessica and Alison. The same way he paid CeCe for information. Ezra was pissed that Ali led him on and lied to him about her age. He admitted that he was crazy about her. So perhaps when Alison went “missing”, there was a whole year for Ezra to start laying the tracks for his “revenge.”

I just don’t believe for one second that if Ezra knew who Aria was the day he “met” her that he didn’t also know about the rest of the girls and their families.

He inserted himself VERY deliberately into drama, and we are supposed just to accept that he just let go of all of that energy and effort just because he got found out?  Or because he loves Aria that much?

I call bullshit.

When Ezra took the bullet in the season 4B finale, I think that Shana was trying to kill him because he is a puppet master. I still don’t know why the girls believed Shana was “A” — she clearly said her agenda wasn’t a game, it was payback. She wanted Alison dead for all of the shitty things she did to others.  Ezra trying to convince the girls that Shana was A was just a distraction.

I believe that Ezra has been running things since day one and if Marlene and company made the motivation decent enough, it could wrap the story up amazingly.

I’m also 90% convinced that Ezra and Wren are friends in the PLL universe. I’ve thought for quite some time that this scene was Wren calling Ezra.

Could Sabrina and Ezra be AD on Pretty Little Liars

Photo Credit: Tumblr

As was CeCe while she hid out fromt he cops in Ezra’s Ravenswood lair.

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Photo Credit: PLL Wiki

Other weird things about Ezra:

  • He goes on “trips” and visits “buddies” when things are going down.  Where is he really?
  • He was MIA during the buying and selling of his family Jaguar (and also conveniently had thousands of dollars in cash in his sock drawer the very episode after Jason DiLaurentis writes a $50k check to “cash” in exchange for information about the whereabouts of Alison’s “corpse.”)
  • He suddenly appears at the end of the Halloween Train in season 3. How did he insert himself into a crime scene filled with high school students? He just gets to waltz in and hug his underage girlfriend who was in a box filled with a dead cop? Weird.
  • He had CeCe Drake on his payroll, and she was listening outside his door after the Hoe Down (omg that episode was so cringeworthy.)
  • He slashed Spencer’s tire in Ravenswood and then attacked her in the Grunwald’s house.
  • AND what the fuck was that costume he had on? Creeperton.
  • His creepy cabin that belongs to a “buddy who was in Europe” — Wren much?
  • Breaking into Hanna’s bedroom and computer and remotely shutting off Emily’s car stranding the girls so he could steal Ali’s diary back.
  • The Truman Capote/Haper Lee connection (a character from To Kill a Mockingbird was based on Truman Capote – and Truman Capote authored Breakfast at Tiffany’s.  Creating the characters Varjack/Holly Golightly.
  • Um, his Ravenswood Lair. That wasn’t a writing studio; it was a surveillance unit for a creep.
  • He named his company ‘Shawbee, LLC’ after Ali’s favorite beach in Cape May.
  • Ezra claims that after he sent Aria back to The Radley in a cab the night of Charlotte’s murder that he “went to the House of Pies and talked to a trucker for three hours.” Ezra and his pies.
  • Speaking of pies; in the 7B trailer, Mona reads a note from AD that reads, “Time for Pie. Be there.”
  • Ezra was MIA episode 7×03 and 7×04 because he was apparently in NY visiting Nicole’s parents. This extra could be a continuity error, but when Nicole visits Emily in season 6A, she mentions that her father lives in Florida.
  • I’m pretty sure Ezra killed Sara Harvey because he mentions the murder as he’s convincing Aria that they should elope in Tuscany. He even jokingly asks Aria if she killed Sara Harvey. Why the hurry to get out of town? Why the rush to make it official? They’ve been back together for ten minutes.
  • Eddie Lamb calls him and then is never seen again.
  • I know we are to assume that Ezra didn’t put the knives in Jake’s punching bag, but I’m pretty sure he did.
  • According to Alison, she had CeCe wear the red coat in Now You See Me Now You Don’t to divert A from sawing Emily in half.  Right after Alison has Spencer chase her up to Ezra’s lair.
  • Mrs. Grunwald told Hanna that there is a darkness surrounding her and Caleb. She also felt that Ezra had ‘touched’ one of the girls. I don’t care, she was talking about Ezra in Season 4, and I think she got the same vibe in 7×08.

There are plenty of other bizarre things that Ezra’s involved in, and I’m sure the people who don’t suspect Ezra of being the biggest bad will have an answer and explanation for all of them.

I’ve seen people comment on social media/Reddit/etc., “but you can see on Instagram that Lucy Hale is wearing a veil on set, so they apparently get married…” but so what? I think the AD reveal is going to happen at the EzriA wedding. The last episode of the series is titled, “Till DeAth Do Us PArt.” Just because Lucy is wearing tulle and lace, doesn’t mean that everything goes according to plan.

Sabrina + Ezra + AD + Endgame PLL

Photo Credit: Pinterest

I mean it’s in the title, PLL is a show about liars.

And as for those who say, “Ezra was in Columbia with Nicole during the 7A finale so that couldn’t be him” — we don’t know the exact timeline of all events. As well, the fact that the person who pulled Jenna out had on the old school black hoodie leads me to believe it was NOT AD.

Jenna is blind. She doesn’t know who pulled her out, the mask that was thrown down was her only indication as to who was in the van.

I think it was Mona who pulled Jenna out. Mona is working for AD as a means to try and figure out who he/she is. Mona is the DArkest Knight (episode title). I think she was trying to shoot Jenna and hit Spencer by accident.

My final reason for suspecting that Ezra is the endgame villain of PLL is from social media posts Marlene King made before the 6×20 finale last year.

 

Could Sabrina and Ezra be AD on Pretty Little Liars

VILL-IAN. Not Ian Thomas. Ian Harding. Ezra. Yeah.

Who do you think is AD? Do you think Marlene would dare make Ezra the ultimate big bad?

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